Why Series seven Sucks

The first ten reasons

Rimmer is gone/dead. The Cat is a pilot. Lister is vapid. Kryten is whinny. Everything's changed. Lister loves Kochanski? Kochanski's character is weak. Searching in Star Bug. There are no plots. Inane storylines. Holly.

Hey, I'm not just going off here. This is well thought out and reasoned. You don't have to agree with me, but these are the reasons i was so disappointed with Series Seven.

  • Rimmer is gone/dead.
  • The interaction between Lister and Rimmer is the entire underpinning of the show, the foundation that everything centers on. This interaction is based on a fundamental class difference (that doesn't really exist in the USA -- that is why the US pilots didn't work!) and it is where all of the irony and humor derive from. Without this political commentary and character interplay, the show is just a lot of fart jokes -- Black Adder with out Rowan Atkinson. It's not just dumb -- it's embarrassingly intolerable.

  • The Cat is a pilot.
  • One of the most wonderful things about Red Dwarf is Danny Jules-John's characterization of an actual cat -- it's right on the mark. The moves, the clothes, the horniness, the arrogance, etc. "I'm gonna eat you little fishy!", "This is mine, and this is mine and this is mine..." In Series Seven the Cat is: THE PILOT. That's all. Nothing more. Just this guy who sits in the background and steers the ship. It's sad. I'm not unhappy that they gave him something to do, but it is horribly disappoiting that they removed all of his character! For the first time ever he doesn't care that there is a woman on board the ship. He doesn't eat at all during the series, everything he says and does makes sense and he even wears the same suit throughout the whole series!!!!! Bring back the Cat!

  • Lister is vapid.
  • We've grown to love Lister as a thoughtful, caring, intelligent guy, who just happens to chew his toenails and eat atomic curries. The juxtaposition of his humanity, and intellect, with his filth was the entire structure of the character -- we were actually happy that the last human alive was this kind of person, good hearted, intelligent, but down to earth enough and with a strong enough self image that he didn't have to accomplish anything. The quintessential opposite of Rimmer. The series seven Lister is a vapid parody. He's worse than a US TV character. The goodness of character (which is fundamental to his personality in series 1 - 6) never shows, although a bit of rage and vengeance does. (Now i realize Craig Charles was on trial for possible criminal acts during the filming of this series and GrantNaylor didn't know if he would be convicted, thus requiring Lister to be killed off, but that doesn't excuse the complete change/loss of personality.)

  • Kryten is whinny.
  • Kryten as a slightly "off" android was amusing -- Kryten as an over the edge, out of control, stupid, domineering, jealous loony is awful and painfully embarrassing to watch. For the first time in Red Dwarf we are presented with situations that have an obvious, easy solution that is ignored by the characters -- just like all US sitcoms. (Such as when Kryten makes the anniversary dinner right when they were heading to the VR suite. The whole show is based on the problems this causes when they could easily eat and THEN play. Come on, what kind of time constraints do the have? They're lost in deep space!!!!) It is insulting.

  • Everything's changed.
  • How can you call it a character if the entire personality changes at will?Every character in the show has changed completely and fundmentally -- they are unrecognizable. It's not Red Dwarf. It's obvious they are trying to appeal to a mainstrem American audience -- but then, i don't like American TV. Perhaps they are all supposed to be imposters and Series Eight will show us the real Boyz from the Dwarf.

  • Lister loves Kochanski?
  • The second of the three fundamental issues in Red Dwarf is destroyed, not by bringing Crissie Kochanski on board, but by making Lister not care. For 36 shows one of the most important aspects of his personality was his pining for Kochanski. Now she's here and she's a bitch who doesn't want him. This alone breaks the spell to some degree... but shouldn't he CARE!!? Shouldn't this have some kind of effect on him? ...or perhaps this is the excuse for why he has no personality in Series seven?

  • Kochanski's character is weak.
  • Instead of trying to actually create a character, they appear to have told Chloe to just be as bitchy as possible. She shows the occasional evidence of talent or feelings, but they are fleeting. Late in the series GrantNaylor appears to try to replicate the upper class half of the Lister-Rimmer class war using Kochanski, however it fails completely.
    Worst of all, she isn't Kochanski! Chloe doesn't even resemble CP Grogan in the slightest -- and she's obviously more than 10 years younger than Grogan AND Lister. Finally, and this really shouldn't matter, but lacking any other redeemable qualities, it is disappointing that she isn't even attractive.

  • Searching in Star Bug.
  • The last of the three basic premises in the show was the complete lack of control, and lack of anything to do. The three (and then four) of them were left with this HUGE ship to explore and strange exploits to concoct, but ABSOLUTELY NOTHING else to do -- This made the show. Now (as well as in series 6) they are in a spacecraft seeking out strange new worlds. I don't know why they decided to move away from what worked, but now it's not Red Dwarf, it's fucking Star Trek, only with less cleavage and weaker plotlines.

  • There are no plots.
  • All eight of the shows have little or no plot. So what? very few of the 36 previous shows had any plot either. But the previous shows had Lister & Rimmer fighting a class war, Lister the sensitive human in a filthy shell struggling with boredom and lost love, The Cat's antics, a crazy computer and a slightly disturbed android all stuck with lots of time on their hands on huge ship with no direction or goal thus giving the crew something to explore along with their feeling of ennui. All of that is gone. All of it. So it the lack of a plot becomes a major problem.

  • Inane storylines.
  • The bit about changing the JFK assassination was not only totally random, but utterly stupid. (Although i do have to admit to being briefly amused by the final touch that left JFK assassinating himself from the grassy knoll!) When Lister leaves himself as a baby under the pool table to "give some continuality to the universe and hold it together for ever" Is not only stupid but self important and arrogant far out of proportion of the previous series of Red Dwarf. It certainly violates everything we know about Lister's character. The last time he turned out to be god, he was pissed off! This time only the viewers were.

  • Holly.
  • I really miss Holly. I think she/he was a very important part of the lack of control the crew felt. Perhaps i also miss her/him because they made a change in the show with her that REALLY WORKED, unlike all the changes that failed this time. I was thrilled that she/he returned at the end. Perhaps there is hope for Series Eight!